"Alright, ruling out the Ice Caps melting, meteors becoming crashed into us , the Ozone layer leaving and the Sun exploding , we're definitely going to blow ourselves up.
Hokay, so basically we've got China, France, India, Isreal, Pakistan, Russia, the U.K. and Us...with nukes...(We've got about 2600 more than anybody else, whatever).
Henyway, one day, we decides, those Chinese sonsofabitches are going down. So we launch a nuke at China. While it's on it's way, China's like, "Shit shit! Who the fuck is shooting us?" "Oh well! Fire missiles!"
Then France is like, "Shit guys...we got ze missiles zey are coming! Fire our shit!" "But I'm le tired"..."Well, have a nap-zen fire ze missiles!!!"
Meanwhile, Australia is down there like, "wtf, mates?" India, Isreal and Pakistan launch their shit , so now we've got missiles flying everwhere, passing each other. Russia's like, "AAAHHH!! Motherland!" Then England's like, "'Bout that time, eh, chaps?"..."Righto"...
So now the U.S. is like, "Fuck, we're dumbasses" . Canada's like, "What's going on, eh?" Australia's still like, "wtf?" Mars is laughing at us. And some huge meteor is like, "Well fuck that"...
So, now we've got nuclear winter , heveryone's dead 'cept Australia, and they're still like, "wtf?"...But they'll be dead soon. Fucking Kangaroos.
But, assuming we don't blow ourselves up, us Californians just have to worry about California breaking off from the United States. To go hang with Hawaii . Alaska can come too
The End! "